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Online dating mistakes

The world of #dating is much different for guys than it is for women... VASTLY DIFFERENT!

So let's pretend that you are a regular, average, everyday guy... doing the online dating app thing... like 5 million other regular, average, everyday guys... and you just happen to #match with someone...

I can sense your excitement...

And so you text her a one word message 3 seconds after matching...

and wait...

and wait...

and wait...

and wait...

... and never get a response.

So now you are, disappointed, frustrated and pissed off.


But during the time that you two matched until now... she has matched with 100 other guys.

One point for you... 100 points for her.

And every time she ##swiperight she gets another match.

And then the messages start rolling in to her phone. One hundred one word messages just like the one you sent... you beautiful and unique #snowflake.

She's hoping for the beautiful Hollywood version of romance but all she gets is 100 "hey"'s!

Because she has soooooo many other guys just like you trying to get her attention and look cool by sending her one word messages... she ignores them all.

She doesn't even take the time to unmatch because it takes more time... and by this time she has #adulting to do.

She's now bored with the app, is hungry, has bills to pay, classes to attend, groceries to buy, friends to see, a dog to walk. She has to return her mom's call, take her car to the mechanic, buy a cute dress... she doesn't have time for all the beautiful and unique snowflakes she matches with!

And after a while it isn't fun for her anymore so she shuts the app down and goes about her life.

And in her mind it doesn't matter if she responds or not because there will always be more regular, average, everyday guys.

She's not wrong.

Maybe if there's something #interesting about them she may respond but honestly... in her world... it's getting #boringaf.

Now back to your world...

Being the butt hurt, disappointed, frustrated, angry little boy you are... because you have one measly match who isn't responding... because in your mind she's being a #bisch... you decide to send her an angry message or #unmatch.

That'll show her!

Guess what...

She didn't even notice

Ya... I know...

Your mom thinks you're great... and to be clear... she did me a HUGE favor and you a GRAVE disservice by making you think from the time you were born that the sun shines out your ass!

It wasn't her fault. She was just hopped up on hormones from being pregnant with you and excited to finally have a purpose to her life and thrilled about you exiting her body finally so she could have #wine with her friends again.

She did it honestly because you are her little man. She carried you in her womb for 9 months and celebrated every one of your mediocre little achievements... making you feel like a rock gawd every time you made bears in the potty!

And then you get out into the real world and wonder why you aren't getting any attention from women.

It's not rocket science princess!

You want the biggest reward from the least amount of effort. Just like the other 99 beautiful and unique snowflakes.

Let's try empathy for a couple of minutes... I know... you're not used to it. It makes you uncomfortable. Poor fella... maybe your mom can give you a hug and a cookie.

How would you feel if women everywhere threw themselves at you all day long?

After about 10 minutes you'd be bored out of your mind and rolling your eyes at the next woman telling you how beautiful you are.

Especially if they are just regular average everyday women...

But isn't that exactly like you... just a regular average everyday guy... sending a one word message to the only girl you matched with... just like the other hundred regular average everyday guys who matched with her that she isn't responding to either.

And sincerely...

I wan't to say thank you ... to you... for making my job of meeting women easier.

So please... keep being basic!

It happened to your dad too... that's why he married your mom. She was the only one that would give him any attention... because he was just as basic as you so he figured he'd better do the smart thing and get her tied down with a ring cuz he wasn't getting any younger and he wasn't gonna do any better than her.

And they convinced themselves that they loved each other but probably it was just that they were horny and intercourse before marriage was a sin so they did the exact same thing as their parents... marry the first somewhat acceptable person that came along.

Hollywood lied to you.

Stop doing what doesn't work

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